Thursday, March 5, 2020

Alfred E. Neuman on the Stock Market Crash

Everyone’s on their smartphones all the time
checking the progress of the epidemic;
but I’m not worried, we’ll be fine.
I’m trying to think of a rhyme
for “time”—the toc that follows every tic—
all of us on our smartphones all the time—
we, the prime
reason why everyone is getting sick
to begin with; but I’m not worried, we’ll be fine.
It’d be better for us to camp out in the pines—
playing duck-duck gray duck or duck-duck 

goose—with our smartphones dinging
whenever someone mentions us or pings
us in our email—stack
of dire solicitations; but I’m not worried, we’ll be fine.
Never sure where to draw the line
between serenity and panic.
Trying to put my smartphone down.
What, me worry?—we’ll be fine.