Jury Service in Covid Time

“What will be the topic for my yokel-soliloquy?”
I ask, as I feel my way into the day.
My back hurts and my coffee tastes funny.

Well, I’ve been summoned for jury duty—
not sure what there is to say
about that for my yokel-soliloquy.

Is it a good enough excuse that I’m on covid quarantine?
I suppose I’d need a signed excuse from the DA.
But my back hurts and my coffee tastes funny.

Waiting for days in a stuffy room
while they figure out which jury
to put me on? Heavy price for a yokel-soliloquy,

though I guess I have to do my civic duty.
So sad that it all has to end this way,
with my back hurting and my coffee tasting funny:

“Shut up and hand over the money,”
they’ll say as they explain the fine I’ll have to pay—
jail time to boot—for refusing today's topic for my yokel-soliloquy.
“It’s gonna be cash on the barrelhead, honey!”